My mind played out it's thoughts of self and purpose and good and bad and I just listened to what everyone had to say... The University of the Pacific fans were flying high over their team making it into the NCAA basketball tournament I saw a number of vehicles on the road with signs exhorting the Tigers on did they make it to the sweet 16? I forget...

   If you were a sports fan last weekends games were just extraordinary. One has to realize that these amateur athletes these young students from all over the nation, are not millionaires and for 80 or 90 percent they will not become pros... This is it. this is the week of their lives... I am digressing... Bravo! 

   Someone has to lose...be very proud to have played.

   Rush Limbaugh suggests that the Universities should be allowed to have two liberals on every campus just to remind everyone how wacko their ideas are...
I think like George Bush he is a bit full of himself these days.. perhaps every day for Rush. Some scholar went off on what an outrage that we are even considering granting any rights to the terrorists in Guantanamo. Judicial insanity he said...
again that liberal squishiness...that so many are so sick of. Due process but not for evil people that's what I think he is saying.

  I found some talk on the Old testament but he was missing the exciting stories. I listened to a recording of a testimonial of a great Christian Preacher his daughter spoke of him with such devotion and in such glowing terms... it was inspiring and I pondered the meaning of being a great Father all I can do is look back since I have never been one myself and have not even handled being a Godfather... many many years ago and my Godson and parents moved on and I have no idea I am sure they have all disowned me... another thing to feel guilt about..! 

   My godson was named after a prophet though and I can't remember which.
 Must have been Elijah... praise the lord, love you M&L where ever you are.

  I loved the talk she gave about her father and the Reverend spoke and he seemed
absolutely genuine and full of a gift of Love and he moved me a bit and I know that
the Christian religion has an ocean of beautiful people trying their best to Live fully awakened Spiritual lives... I think many who have left that place of Christianity for anything but religion because of... the Judgementfulness, because of the Hypocrisy
and whatever real or imagined failings they perceive might need to lighten up a bit
and recognize that there are people out there who are very genuine and uphold a very high connection to something genuine. Family and marriage and responsibility etc... there is nothing wrong with that! There is nothing wrong with trying to create a strong foundation for a Life on Earth.

  There is a movement to really take over more and more of the culture of the USA
and this potent Christian force with its conservative leanings is very real and as you drive through the great California Valley you hear it. Then there is still the force of popular culture that stands outside this religion, there are strands of those who mock
this unhip world of Churchgoers it is evident here and there you hear a lot of talk among the liberal world of a creeping Fascism alive in the US masked by a facade of
Christian Godliness. There is a thought in conservative circles that they are actually going to achieve some form of triumph even greater than what they now hold in terms of bringing Christian Values to the fore in this nation. 

  I was thinking of all these things as I drove through the valley and tonight again.
I drove through in my little '87 Toyota Tercel barely making 60 miles an hour as the traffic zoomed by get out of the way you little bum said the 18 wheelers as they roared past. Towards the southern end of the valley I pulled off when I saw the sign for the Tule Elk Preserve and found it a mile or so off the highway. There were a few of the big creatures out there in the meadow relaxing fenced in they have a few acres to wander in. There used to be herds of them... thousands across the valley. there were a lot of things that used to be. I love wildness and freedom so I get nostalgic... So I took another nap and then got back out on the highway. A little green Toyota Tercel about as old as mine ...zooms by about 75 mph. Bastard! I said to myself.. how the heck can he do that...?

  Then I went back to spiritual issues and the radio and this was mindblowing I am hearing an Atheist in a full flamed empirical discussion trying to prove that all religion is completely nuts! This in the central valley.. Wow! I keep listening and soon it appears that I am in the midst of an actual recorded debate with a theologian and I still can't believe that Conservative Religion would even give the guy a chance in the pulpit but they did and he even had the last word. But to me they were just a couple of ships passing in the night neither heard a word the other was saying. The atheist's
attempt to prove or to suggest that if God existed he must be diabolical... I can't relate to that despite my bad dreams and human history.... Anyways turned out that show was some Catholic programming and I said to myself. Right on! Spread some catholic messages here and there break up the fundamentalist monopoly.. I have thought at times the concept of original sin to be a very valuable concept to keep all our egos in check. Taste a little of the Yin and Yang ..  you think you are really saved ...you have the audacity.. the temerity to believe that you can walk up to heaven and God will not judge you! You think that Spiritual Pride will give you a free ride!

   Lot's of thoughts as I drive through the valley. At the southern end of this vast valley all of a sudden you have only one choice if you want to reach LA. You must begin an awesome little grade that will get you up almost a mile above sea level in a very short time. It's called 'the Grapevine' for some reason also Tejon Pass. I am leaving the valley and it's been a good five hour drive full of soulsaving ponderings and as I cruise on up the hill doing just fine over there up ahead on the right aha... there is that little green Tercel with it's hood up, parked on the side of the road. This mountain is a bear, a monster, it will destroy your poor overheated little vehicle like that. Snap! and I just gloat in my instant of Nyah Nyah... Hah hah he who drives his Tercel too fast gets burned....

   But no sooner than these thoughts pass my mind... then I find myself
glancing at my own thermometer and Holy CMoly son of a Gun, the Needle is straight up in the Red Zone..... Sheeesh!!!!!!

  Well I make it over to the side of the road just a little farther up on the road around the curve thankfully where the Tercels don't have to look at each other in their despair. I get under the hood and decide that I don't even want to check the water
until things cool down so I say.. wait 20 minutes Guy. So I proceed to do that noticing that I at least have one 8 oz bottle of spring water and wonder how far further up the hill that will that get me. Well about 10 minutes past and I am standing there when... it's a funny world this little green Tercel pulls up behind me. This young man jumps out. 'You need any help?' Well I said, pretending calm.. I am just gonna let the engine cool down and check the water.  Here let me see he says like he knows that I am basically a mechanical idiot.... I try to get him a rag but he already expertly has opened the radiator cap to minimum release and he goes back to his car and lugs out a big container of water and says to me start the engine and I was being so dumb I even forgot that you never want to put cold water into an overheated engine unless the engine is running... he reminds me you don't want to crack the block. All that got taken care of and the thermostat got back to about 50 % and I am thinking... well what a bum I am! Mr Nyah Nyah gets saved by the fellow I passed by. I tried to tell him that I am a complete wretch who didn't deserve to be rescued but I didn't try quite that hard and merely said I am a slight wretch...no that's not true anyways I was in a marvelous, giddy still red in the face from embarrassment state, believing in some divine Mystery all the more. I thanked him his name I think was Jay he was heading to Arizona to be with a girl friend. I wanted to grill him. Why did you do this? Are you 'saved' are you an evangelical are you ??? What was your motivation?

 In my thanks there may have been some hint of a question.

 He had sort of a shaved buzz cut, he had a cigarette that he kept in his mouth as he did his work. 'I like to help.' he said with a shrug. 
 
   Thanks J it was a marvelous ride through the Central Valley.

      
     Guy Meyer, Jr.
        April 3, 2005